If you look closely at this out-of-focus and unpostworthy photograph (which would indict me as a failure and a hack had that not already been made voluminously clear), you'll see that some thoughtful gentleman went to the trouble of blacking out several letters on the second and third Hygeia condom labels, altering the content of the message. The result: "1 Premium Cat Condom." Southern Indiana must be suffering quite the epic bout of feline promiscuity if men are depositing three quarters at a time to buy condoms for their cats. I did, however, notice a plethora of roadside billboards advertising vasectomy reversals, so perhaps neutered cats, having achieved financial independence through their unprecedented success in the theater, are taking advantage of those services. I should mention that I did not see a single cat during my visit to the Sunoco at exit 29 of Interstate 64 (where this picture was taken), but if I had, I would have demanded he use protection.
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